Every waking day I’m trying to find my way.  My life is full of pain, pain, pain.
No one understands me. So misunderstand. Characterized as mean, far from the truth, pain is a better classification. If you felt my pain, you wouldn’t be bubbly either. Hard for others to say. I’m judged by the exterior which thankfully remains intact, but the interior is weighing me down. Add life’s struggles to my internal pain. There may be a select few, those perhaps of a similar hue, who can empathize with my struggles but not my pain. I am a woman who feels so much pain.
But why not give up? Sometimes I ask myself, “Why me? Why me?” I ask my mom, “Why me?” Gloomy days and gloomy nights. My heart cries out for love, for a soft touch, for companionship, friendship, and happiness. What can I do to be happy? This is the question that remains to be answered. In the meantime, I put my fate in God’s hands. I have faith for this is why I still wake each day. I know that there are things that I can control. I am an advocate for myself…a fighter since birth. I came into this world ill but refuse to succumb to the prognosis—instead I made it my life mission to defeat the odds.
This is how I will one day find my happiness. I have been blessed with the will to fight, the will to believe, and the desire to succeed. This is what keeps me going. I’m never complacent. Always striving to do better while realizing my human imperfections. My story, my  life, my will to succeed will bring me happiness. Here is the bitter, the sweet, and the ugly.
Real Talk
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20 thoughts on “

  1. I love this! There are more of us going through this struggle than not. This outlines the challenges of life. Unfortunately for some of us the burden is much greater than for others. I’d like to think it’s bc of the strength that lies within us. God always has purpose is my belief

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your such an amazing n beautiful person n mother that I’ve had the pleasure knowing thru school n as adults!! I will continue reading bsrealtalk cause its definitely helping me thru!!! Love ya lady

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I am so proud and happy that you have started this blog and are sharing your thoughts. I can totally relate to a lot that you have expressed. It is good to know that others are experiencing the same things and can share. This is definitely an outlet for people to get some relief.

    Like

  4. Hello BraveHeart
    I admire your truth. Many of us including myself share your pain. Everything looks so well put together on the outside but on the inside we are dying.
    Everyone knows you, but yet no one understands.
    Carrying the weight of everyone around you, being labelled strong so “they” all feel that you dont need anything or assume you have it all together.
    Little do “they” know a hug or some encouragement could help.
    The journey of healing is painful, but addressing it does make it easier to bear.
    It teaches us something about our Soul…..
    May God bless you and Carry you on this journey.
    I am so proud of you and I thank you 😘

    Like

  5. BRAVO!! Beautifully written and expressed!! You are very talented and honest!! Keep up the great work! I know your words will touch the hearts and lives of many!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Your words hit home. The struggles are real but my faith is greater. To God be the the Glory. I hear you, I see you, I admire you…❤

    Like

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